Flirting and hurting are two different things. There are several ways to tell the difference between the two.
Familiarizing yourself with how the behavior is perceived, how it makes others feel, and the results of the behavior, will help you figure out the difference between the two.
Flirting behaviors are:
- Wanted
- Respect motivated
- Legal
- Consensual
- Reciprocal
Flirting is perceived as:
- Flattering and complimentary
- Mutual
- Open
- Fun
Flirting makes receiver feel:
- Attractive
- Flattered
- Good
- Happy
- In control
- Confident
Flirting results in:
- Positive self-image
- High self-esteem
Hurting behaviors are:
- Unwanted
- Power motivated
- Illegal
- Non-consensual
- One-sided
Hurting is perceived as:
- Demeaning and degrading
- One-sided
- Invading
- Scary and uncomfortable
Hurting makes receiver feel:
- Ugly
- Demeaned
- Bad
- Sad and angry
- Powerless
- Helpless
- Disrespected
Hurting results in:
- Negative self-image
- Low self-esteem